NOTE: Some of these blogs are older, transfered from previous years on yahoo.
Good evening readers. I wanted to share of few experiences about overcoming poverty consciousness. Fears of lack or scarcity. I did not grow up poor by any means, However I left home at 16 years old. I was pregnant and married at 16. I was used to having all my needs paid for and met before I moved. I don’t recommend this route for anyone. I did have 3 kids by the time I was twenty. I was not from a broken home and had loving parents. When my husband at the time being so young was either laid off, fired or quit, we got some rude awakenings. Fear and panic set in feelings of lack and scarcity. I am 44 years old and did not heal or overcome this thought process until age 43. Here are some quick examples of how things worked in the past. Fear of lack of work-surely work did not come. Fear that the power would get shut off- it did. Fear of running out of gas-I did. Fear of scarcity of food to reach the month- it happened. Fear of loosing property and home-It happened. Terror of loosing a child- It happened. Fear of a tree falling on the house-It did. Fear of my fights with first husband-They got worse. Fear of pets getting lost,or eaten by a Coyote-It happened. Fear of husband not coming home from work to drink-It happened. Scarcity with myself, didn’t buy clothes because I said if I did there would not be enough money left. There wasn’t so I would always take my new outfit back the next day, even hair dye. I was buying an outfit knowing I could just wear it for a few hours, in the back of my mind I knew I had to take it back because there just wasn’t enough for me to have clothes. I was scarce with my hair only getting it cut once a year, sometimes twice. I was afraid to work because after my second marriage we had 7 kids. His mine and our one. I couldn’t leave them alone because they fought and I was afraid they would really hurt each other. When I finally went to work, I owned my own cleaning business with a friend for 8 years. I was so fearful when my kids were small I cut up there hot dogs until they were 6 so they would not choke, they didn’t get meats except soft hamburger until they were 3 or 4, gum at 6 or 7. No hard candy until they got it at school and I had no control. I have been overweight for years because of fear, the 3 times I was thin, I did receive a lot of male attention -this scared me as I was married. Fear of compliments as well. Fear of looking good. I was terrified for other people to drive me. A drunk driver hit me at 18 and I still mostly do all of the driving, it is rare for me to let someone drive me. This I am working on as my son will get his license next week and will drive me home. Fear of the dark. Fear of the devil, ghosts, a agnus in the bathroom mirror. The list goes on and on and on. Now I have overcome all of this type of thinking and thought patterns. I recognize the triggers which are memories of my program and story, and how I reacted and others reacted around me growing up. I still have the dark to conquer and letting others drive me. When I am alone in the house at night I like the lights on. I won’t walk to my moms who lives next door at night unless I am walked or someone stands out and shines a light. These two I am working first to find out why, whats the trigger and where did the fear first come from. I know about the car riding being the accident. The dark I am working on. However I have no fear of spiritual or paranormal. It’s more like predatory people or a wild animal. I had some healing and energy work done last year regarding fear, lack and how like attracts like. I realized there is no lack, I started to affirm this and believe this. I spoke out loud regarding situations that used to cause fear with positive words. I focused on the good. I thanked God everyday in gratitude. I have a power bill that I have paid on for almost a year and a half that by all rights or normal logic would have been shut off many times over. I affirm everyday that there is no lack, all of my needs are met, I except good graciously and with gratitude everyday. All of my needs are divinely met. I relax in the flow of abundance which belongs to everyone and there is plenty. I had a big test last year. I had a power man come to my door to shut me off for the past due balance of 600.00$. I said please can we call my payment must be lost, he said go ahead but it won’t do any good he said real grouchy. I called them and the pay station store where I handed my payment to the clerk. She said the payment machine was closed for the night and would be filed in the morning. I got a make shift receipt. The clerk said, Yes I found your payment, it was under some store mail. I asked her to call the power company, she did and there was proof. The power worker said, let me speak to the man in the field. She said it was his call and could shut me off if he wanted by law. He still wanted to shut me off angrily. I said wait let me see how much money I have. All along I just viewed it and trusted but was going to try to fight the good fight, but in peace. No panic you know it is what it is. I walked in the house and took a deep breathe and said to God and the angels. I trust you. I went back out and he barked how much do ya have? I smiled big and said happily 47$. He looked at me intense while I said in my head, there is no lack. He then said give it to me and scribbled a receipt. I said have a great day. He grumbled ya it’s your lucky day. This has happened like this for a year with the exception of no more men at the house. Many many shut off notices because with an unemployment check which is substantially lower then wages, rather then pay everything to power, we do not fear scarcity, do not hold back or withhold from ourselves. We give to charity. We always make it just fine. Much gratitude goes to my mom because before When I feared lack I was borrowing from her often, pay her back and stay in the same cycle. I am also very thankful to have this place to live where we only have to pay garbage and shared property costs. Our power bill last Dec was 500.00 in jan 700. in feb 580. in march 481. We were getting from unemployment 240.00 per week, had phone, garbage, taxes, insurance, food, gas, toiletries, pet foods and needs, broken cars, found out the pipes were off hanging under the house and all the heat was blowing right out. I was borrowing money to make it and paying it right back which made us short to pay things. My husband feared no work and didn’t get any. The power company then said because my pipes were broke I could pay all of my current bills plus a 105.00 installment on top of that each month. My daughter and 3 kids became homeless and moved in. There was Christmas and birthdays for our 6 kids as one is departed. 11 grand kids. My husband, mother and her boyfriend. Although we borrowed and paid back I started to change my thoughts thanks to a special teacher, healer and friend. I called her one day in a frenzied, drama filled panic attack over the power and bills etc. She said stop! Look outside, what do you see. I said trees and grass. She said are the concerned about survival. I said no. She said do you have food-Yes, do you have clean running water-yes, is your house warm do you have heat-yes, can you breathe the air-yes, OK count all of these blessings and show gratitude for it and feel it. Repeat these words- I except good graciously in my life always, The source of all abundance is God or the divine, I have more then enough to supply my needs, and more then enough to give. There is no lack, I stake my claim in the inheritance of the kingdom of God which is for everyone and there is more then enough. I am divinely taken care of at all times and I relax in this source knowing this is my birthright. I have no fear. After affirming this for a few months and my teacher did some healing energy work and asked Arch Angel Michael to cut all cords to any and all imprints, fears or beliefs in all spaces of time. Past present and future of any form lack, scarcity or poverty consciousness. It took my husband longer to change his ideas about like attracts like but he is getting better with it all of the time. He is doing a government job right now for 39.00$ per hour, a far cry from 240 per week. We are blessed and in great gratitude. We have our cars running, overflowing cupboards of food. plenty of pet food, We are all healthy, have phone, internet, everyone got a gift for there birthdays and Christmas, got my hair done, bought and paid off a a play station 3 and a 200.00 boom box through the last year too for my son. I still owe 600 on the power, owe the phone. my husband got paid for one day only last week because he started on the end of the pay cycle. Next week paying whole balance of power and phone. I did miraculously last year get 2 energy grants. It was up in the air as sometimes employment can change this, my husband would get called to work making 16 per hour for 2 to 3 4 days and then get unemployment the next. we barely made the mark. Trust in the source, there is no lack. Abundance comes in very creative ways from many different creative sources. Sometimes God will even enlist people to help. Gifts from the universe come from out of nowhere when you least expect it when you trust. All is well and will be celebrating my 0 balance on my power that at one time read 2000.00. Abundance is everything we have including ourselves overflowing. Sweet Dreams people …..Tray.
P.S. Also we do not have credit cards, checking account or charge accounts. Are you wondering why I didn’t work during this time to help out? Fear. When I worked before I developed chemical sensitivity and arthritis, Lost my dad brother and stepson in 9 months then had about one to two people close to us die per year, went through a big cocoon stage. Fear of happiness and moving forward. I am so so ready to work now it isn’t even funny. I had put some apps in last year to no avail but I feared going back to work. I will work this year. I am very excited for the work God is bring me, and the work I will attract.
